Tag Archives: happiness

saturday upsides: even chores have silver linings

Posted on by

4

Happy Saturday! I can’t believe how quickly this Thanksgiving weekend is flying by. We’re having a wonderful time visiting Mike’s family, and it’s been a nice mix of productive work time, relaxing lazy time, Christmas shopping time, family time, and of course eating yummy food time! I need to do a bit more grading before we head back to school on Monday … I tend to put grading at the bottom of my to-do list {maybe because I really dislike giving bad grades and sometimes I simply have to.} The great students more than make up for it, though. Which brings me to my topic for today’s Saturday Upside, linked up with Bonnie at Recipes Happen:

even chores have silver linings

We all have those chores we don’t like to do, those small tasks that we procrastinate on. For me it’s grading and cleaning the bathroom. Mike really dislikes doing laundry. Another friend of mine hates doing the dishes.

But the thing I’ve learned about procrastinating is that it just makes the dreaded chore bigger than it needs to be. It gives it power by letting it take up your brain space. The dread of what needs to be done later taints the present time, which is time spent doing other things you do enjoy. And then, when you finally do get around to completing whatever it was you were procrastinating on, don’t you often think, I guess that wasn’t so bad/didn’t take so long/wasn’t as difficult as I was expecting? It happens to me a lot. It would be so much better if I would just bite the bullet and complete the chore before the procrastination lethargy settles in!

Something that helps me is to try to find the silver lining even in life’s chores. Maybe that means putting on my favorite new CD or Pandora playlist and dancing while I clean the bathroom. Mike folds laundry while watching one of his favorite TV shows. Even washing the dishes could be time spent daydreaming about your dream vacation or mentally plotting out your Christmas list or listening to an intriguing podcast or audiobook. Hate to exercise? Call a friend and have a catch-up chat while you walk around the neighborhood. Or power-walk around the mall while you window-shop!

“Silver linings” can also be mini-rewards you give yourself. Like I said, I have lots of terrific students, and I often save the papers from my best students for the end of my grading stack, as a little reward for me at the end. {It always makes me so happy and proud to see my students trying their best and shining with their work!} Maybe you could break chores up with little treats: a good cup of coffee or tea, a chapter of the great book you’re reading, a square of dark chocolate, a game of fetch with your dog, a phone call to a friend. It also helps me to think about the end goal of whatever I’m doing: the students I hope I am helping become better writers, for example; or how important it is to keep the bathroom clean and wiped down to stay healthy, especially during the winter cold/flu season!

And sometimes it helps to get down to the basics: if I feel annoyed at having to clean my apartment, I’ll remind myself how lucky I am to have a place to call my own. On those days I don’t feel like getting up and going to work, I think instead about all the people who are trying so hard to find work, and how lucky I am to have a job to get up and go to!

What could be the silver linings in some of your least favorite chores or tasks?

thanksgiving gratitude list

Posted on by

0

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! I am spending the long weekend with Mike’s family up in Chicago and they have welcomed me into their household with open arms and absolutely delicious food. Especially during the holiday season, it is very hard to be so far away from my parents and Greg! Luckily I’ll get to go home for winter break and spend Christmas in Ventura with them. 🙂

Something I like to do often, but especially on Thanksgiving, is to make a “gratitude list” of all the blessings I have in my life and all the reasons I have to be thankful and happy. Often I make a mental list {it is a great way to fall asleep … counting your blessings!} but today on Thanksgiving I want to write a list down. So here it is:

my {ever-expanding!} gratitude list

  • my amazing, supportive, one-in-a-million parents and brother, and all of my terrific extended family, too!
  • my fun and thoughtful and lovely friends, near and far
  • my health {something that I didn’t used to appreciate nearly enough, but feel more and more grateful for the older I get}
  • that I always have not only enough food to eat, but also enough grocery money to buy organic fruits & veggies & dairy even though they are more expensive
  • my safe, warm, cozy apartment that is feeling more and more like home
  • my parents’ home in Ventura that will *always* feel like home and welcome me back with open arms
  • the opportunity to pursue my passions for writing and teaching as a career
  • the incredibly supportive teachers and mentors I’ve had throughout my life — from my first-grade teacher who gave my shy self confidence by casting me as the lead in our school play, to my middle school and high school teachers who encouraged my love of writing, to my teachers at USC and now at Purdue who have helped me develop my own writing voice and  nurture my own creative identity
  • my goofy dog Murray, who never fails to make me laugh with his antics and happy doggy smile
  • long walks through an autumn park or on the boardwalk by the Ventura pier
  • rain falling softly outside on a lazy Sunday
  • snuggling up on the couch with my sweetie
  • all the books I’ve devoured and all those I have stacked on my nightstand, waiting for their turn
  • old movies, especially It’s a Wonderful Life, Some Like it Hot, and It Happened One Night
  • watching Bing Crosby Christmas movies every year with my Gramps
  • warm chocolate chip cookies and a big glass of milk
  • shopping dates with my mom
  • lunch dates with my dad
  • my brunch date tradition with my brother
  • 3-hour Simone’s coffee dates with my friend Erica whenever I go home to visit
  • a hot cup of tea, an empty hour or two, and a journal or good book
  • browsing Target with my friend Holly and stocking up on Taylor Swift cards
  • sending and receiving handwritten cards from those I love
  • sunsets {and the occasional sunrises, when I’m up early enough to see them!}
  • Christmas lights twinkling cheerfully against a night sky or the snow
  • hugs and kisses and even tears saying goodbye because it’s a blessing to have so many people to love
  • being part of such a wonderful community of bloggers, and that you would spend a few minutes of your day visiting my little corner of the internet here!

Happy happy happy Thanksgiving! I hope you have a blessed day with those you love!

❤ Dallas

marvelous monday: my favorite tea mug

Posted on by

2

I’ve already told you about my intense love for tea — in fact, my first project for this blog was reorganizing my tea stash in my kitchen cabinet. What I haven’t yet shared are photos of my favorite mugs to brew my tea in. Well, today is the day!

At the top of my list on Monday morning is this sunshiney mug that I got for Christmas last year. I love sunflowers, and this mug is an instant mood-lifter. How can it not be a good morning when you’re drinking a steaming hot cup of tea in this beauty?

On those inevitable “snooze button” days when I’m having an especially hard time rolling out of bed, I reach for this mug: it’s ginormous! Practically a soup bowl. I can brew two regular mug’s worth of tea in a single serving of this amazing mug:

It’s extra special because it came from the Serendipity 3 cafe in NYC. I bought it when I visited my close friend Janet last year, when she was living for a short time in the big apple. She took me there because the movie Serendipity with John Cusack and Kate Beckingsale is one of my all-time favorite movies. It is such a special memory, and drinking tea from this mug always makes me think of Janet and smile.

It’s almost as big as my head!

What are some of your favorite mugs and water glasses? Do you have any small household items that get your day off to a sunny start?

Have a marvelous day!
-Dallas

marvelous monday: guest post by “the sunny girl” Lauren Cook!

Posted on by

2

I am thrilled to have Lauren Cook as a guest on the blog today! She is a dear friend and an inspiration to me to live life with joy, gratitude and love. Her blog The Sunny Girl: The Brighter Side of Things is a treasure trove of insights and resources to make your daily life happier. Check it out!

She was kind enough to stop by the blog today and share some thoughts on finding happiness through a sense of daily accomplishment. Enjoy! 🙂

There are a few things in life that leave me hard-pressed for happiness. Without a good meal, a good night’s rest, and my daily to-do list, I’m lost at my soul’s sea. I love having direction in my life, both for the big picture and for the seemingly small tasks throughout the day. That’s why nearly every day, without fail, I write a check list for what I need to get done and what I want to get done.

The main reason: I love the feeling of accomplishment. Even getting that little “check” on my list for achieving something as simple as going to the grocery store keeps me on track for the day. I know it sounds silly, even ridiculous, but I think it’s so important to stay goal oriented and focused. If I leave my mind to do as it pleases, I’ll end up watching mindless TV, eating that extra scoop of Ben and Jerry’s Greek yogurt (my new obsession!), and delaying my work for the day. I wouldn’t label myself as a procrastinator, but my life is so much more productive when I’ve planned it out on paper.

I write all about happiness for young adults. I’m working on publishing my first book right now and while this is a huge goal, there are hundreds of small goals embedded within it. Without my daily to-do lists, these goals just seem to float along in my head rather than actualize.

I’m so much happier at the end of the day when I can look back on my list and see that I made an EFFORT. Even if I don’t finish a chapter or if I still have emails to send, knowing that I gave it my best for the day leaves me satisfied yet eager to start the next day.

We all have our own ways of writing to-do lists but here are a few of my Sunny Suggestions:

1. Get a planner you love to look at. You’re going to be using it a lot! No matter how you like to take your notes, whether it’s on your phone or a notebook, make sure it’s convenient to carry and nice to look at. I’m hoping for a Lilly Pulitzer notebook soon—with a notebook that pretty I’ll never want to stop adding things to do!

2. Look at it at least three times throughout the day: If it’s out of sight, it’s all too easily out of mind. Sure, it’s simple to write down the tasks but it’s a whole other thing to keep your eyes on the prize. Make sure you have your notes handy so that you can see how much progress you’re making throughout the day.

3. Make goals out of goals: Some days are busier than others. Some days I know I can’t accomplish even half the items on my to-do list. Still, set a goal for how many goals you’d like to finish that day. And if you meet your goal? Don’t stop there! Set a new one and keep going til that sun goes down!

We all ultimately strive for happiness and I think setting goals is a primary way we work towards that happiness. For me it all starts with a to-do list. Make your visual and present on a daily basis. Don’t leave your list in your mind—get it on paper. It’ll motivate you to put in the extra effort.

I hope you start seeing your goals getting accomplished more than ever and I hope you start living the happiest life you’ve always wanted!

Keep shining,

The Sunny Girl, Lauren Cook

Connect with Lauren:

– Blog

– Twitter

– Facebook

marvelous monday: finding balance

Posted on by

2

Happy Labor Day, everyone! According to a quick Wikipedia search, Labor Day was created to celebrate the “social and economic contributions of American workers.” Hope you are enjoying a day of rest and relaxation!

I really love my job, but teaching is something that it can be hard to leave at the office. I’m always bringing home papers to respond to and also thinking about future assignments and lesson plans. Today, I’m celebrating Labor Day by taking a day off from grading and thinking about my classes, and instead just relaxing and enjoying myself. I’m having some friends over for dinner tonight — planning on whipping up a big batch of white chicken chili and corn muffins {recipe post coming soon!} and maybe some lemon bars for dessert. YUM!

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about balance. One of my favorite quotes {which I might have shared on here before, I can’t remember} is from the late, great coach and teacher John Wooden. He said the two most important words in the English language are “love” and “balance.” I think that is so true, and yet balance can be really difficult to achieve. Especially in the fast-paced, multi-tasking-obsessed, constant-communication world we live in these days. It’s so easy to get sucked into the void of doing, doing, doing; more, more, more; faster, faster, faster.

Balance is something I am continually striving for. My work ethic is a quality I am really proud about, yet this is something that can easily slide off-balance. When that happens, I become a stressed-out, perfectionist workaholic. That is not who I want to be or how I want to spend my time!

So I’ve been taking some time each day to focus on balance. Find my center. Close my eyes, take a few deep breaths, and think of all the things I love about my life. I think about who I want to become. The hard work I plan to put in, the goals I want to accomplish–but also the fun things I wish to do, too. The places I want to travel. The fun books I want to read and movies I want to see and concerts I want to go to. The random treasures I want to take advantage of in everyday life: the awesome pinball arcade Mike & I stumbled upon, the nature trail along the river, the plethora of local restaurants we want to try out.

I’ve started to think about balance as a day-by-day thing, something I am working towards each and every day. For me, a good day does mean putting in two or three or four solid hours of work on my thesis draft. But it also means other things, too: relaxing with my sweetie on the couch watching an episode of The Wire; letting my mind wander while I try out a new dish in the kitchen; going for a long walk around the neighborhood; catching up with my family or friends on the phone; laughing till my stomach hurts over a hilarious video on YouTube; making my way through the stack of good books on my bedside table; and on, and on. A truly good day, to me, means a balanced day. I have discovered that I feel the most fulfilled and joyful and content when my life is balanced.

I saw this cartoon in a recent issue in The New Yorker and I wanted to share it here because it seems super appropriate not just to the theme of this blog, but also to the idea of balance.

cartoon from The New Yorker 2012

This cartoon made me smile, but it also gave me pause. I started this blog because I wanted to become more organized in my daily life, while also saving money and time. But I never want organization to become a source of stress, or to feel pressure for perfection. My life and my apartment have become a little more organized in the past few months. I’m making progress. I’m trying new things and cooking more meals at home and flexing my newly developed decorating muscles. But my life will never be perfectly organized. I will never be that woman in the cartoon.

And I think that’s a good thing.

I’m not striving for perfection. I’m striving for balance. To me, love + balance = happiness.

What’s your happiness equation? How do you find balance in your busy life?

-Dallas

marvelous monday: creating rituals with those you love

Posted on by

4

Tomorrow, I head back to Indiana to get ready for the new semester which starts up a week from today. These past ten days I’ve been home with my family in California, and it’s been wonderful to get to visit with my parents, brother, Gramps, and friends from high school. Don’t get me wrong — I love my grad program at Purdue and I love all my friends there! But, as a California girl who spent my undergrad years just a a short drive down the 101 freeway from where I grew up, it is hard being so far from my family for months at a time. We text and talk often on the phone and Skype, but I still miss them. I guess that is just part of having such a loving, supportive, and special family — I miss them when I’m gone!

My younger brother Greg {check out his website giverunning.org to get an idea of the amazing things he’s up to!} has always been one of my best friends. Greg adds so much sunshine to my life! He can make me burst out laughing with a single silly look, and we can meet eyes across the dinner table and know exactly what the other is thinking. He’s three years behind me in school and it was really hard for both of us when I graduated high school and moved off to college.

The morning I left for college, Greg and I went out to breakfast just the two of us to this cute restaurant we’ve always loved, Allison’s Country Cafe. {They make the BEST Belgian waffles topped with hot cinnamon apples — I’m determined to try to recreate them at home this fall, though I know they won’t ever be as good as the ones at Allison’s.} We talked and laughed and it was wonderful just to be enjoying each other’s company as friends. I remember driving home, pulling the car into the driveway, and bursting into tears. I knew I would miss him so much.

Even now, a decade later, I can never say goodbye to Greg without crying. But something that always makes goodbyes easier is the ritual we’ve established: every morning before I leave, we go out to breakfast just the two of us to Allison’s Country Cafe. I get the waffle or pancake with hot cinnamon apples; Greg usually gets the banana nut French toast. We talk and laugh and reminisce and plan for the future. Sometimes, Greg makes me laugh so hard I have trouble swallowing my mouthful of water or orange juice.

Our ritual is something I treasure. It turns the sadness of having to say goodbye into something comforting and special.

What rituals or traditions do you have with those you love?

Have a marvelous week!
-Dallas